Today is filled with longing. Longing for pretty Kate Spade dresses and West Elm sheets. And longing for a lovely mid century home, with hardwood floors and an interior decorator who wants to help me form my “vision.” I also long for a career or working endeavor that brings in steady income to my family and lets us dream a little bigger. And of course I long to meet our little one. She is moving and grooving in there but it’s been 8 months, one week and five long days and the wait sure doesn’t get easier as the days go by.
So on a day like this, I try to sort through the longings I can control and attempt, at least to some degree, to let go of the ones I have absolutely no control over. So I think I’ll look at pretty dresses that are not at kate spade prices and maybe pin on my pinterest board all of my favorite sheets and curtains. Life will work itself out and the baby will most certainly come when she’s good and ready and I’ll find work again after I’ve spent time with my little one.
But for now, I should get back to the writing that does help pay our bills and give myself some time to dream as the day goes on. Maybe this weekend I’ll paint my kitchen chairs bright yellow or get curtains for the baby’s room. Or maybe I’ll sleep in, relax and read a new book for as long as my heart desires.